Parenting Advice – Actions For Raising Tomorrow’s Citizens Today
Beverly OMalley asked:
We all want parenting advice that provides us with the tools we need to raise happy healthy children.
Good parenting does not result from using a standardized recipe or cookie cutter approach to the many challenges our offspring present to us. Good parenting really comes from learning as you go.
Ask yourself, “What kind of adults do I want my children to be?” and then set about to create the circumstances that will allow that to happen. You want your children to be “happy” but if you focus on making your children happy you will not be providing them with the skills they need to create their own happiness.
What you need to be doing is raising your children to be responsible, reliable, and productive adults.
Here are some parenting tips on how to raise responsible, reliable, and productive citizens for tomorrow’s society.
Let your children make mistakes – your child can never learn how to make a good decision if he is not allowed to make a bad one. As the parent you have more wisdom and knowledge about risk and it is your responsibility to assess the possible risk and consequences of a bad decision. Give your child the responsibility for making decisions that have consequences which are of low risk and age appropriate. Parents need to give over the responsibility of decision making and control to the child. This needs to be timed properly not only for the child’s age level but also by the child’s individual maturity level and trustworthiness.
Do not rescue your children from the consequences of their own mistakes. If your child harms someone else with her actions she needs to apologize and if she breaks someone else’s property then she needs to replace it. This can start with children when they are very young. If your child is never connected to the consequences of her own actions she can never develop a sense of responsibility and accountability for what she does. Your child has to make reparations for harm they caused someone else and it is highly recommended that you are involved in that reparation but only in a way that assists her. Your child should be involved from start to finish in carrying out the necessary apology or actions needed to make things right again.
Let your child see you make mistakes but more importantly let your child hear you talk about them and identify why that decision was wrong and what you learned from it. Then do not make the same mistake again! If you do not change your behaviour as a result of what you have learned your child will identify your insincerity and lack of integrity very quickly and know that your statements are meaningless. In short he will learn that you “talk the talk” but you do not “walk the walk”. Your child does not learn from your mistakes, your child learns by seeing you learn from your mistakes. Engaging your child in rationale analysis of why things went wrong will help them to develop skills of critical inquiry that will serve them well in adult life.
Take responsibility for your own mistakes. Most things that happen to you in life are the result of your own actions. If your child sees you taking responsibility she is less likely to see herself as a victim of circumstance and are more likely to feel empowered and in control of her own life.
Apologize when you are wrong. You cannot and should not expect yourself to be perfect. If you were wrong in your judgement say so. “I am so sorry I yelled at you like that, it was very unkind and I apologize. However, you did not follow the rules and so the punishment still stands.”
Teach your child how to ask for help. Perhaps the greatest life skill you can teach your child is that nobody can do everything by themselves all the time. We spend so much time trying to raise independent citizens of tomorrow we forget to teach our children how to ask for help. In order to be productive and positive citizens your child needs to know when he is out of his league and how to seek out help from those who are best equipped to help him. So many problems could be solved so easily if people would just recognize that they have a problem and seek out ways to prevent it from developing into something more complicated.
The best common sense parenting advice for raising your children to be reliable responsible adults? Be a good role model.
Like it or not your children will quite likely grow up to be just like you but in a slightly different package.
We all want parenting advice that provides us with the tools we need to raise happy healthy children.
Good parenting does not result from using a standardized recipe or cookie cutter approach to the many challenges our offspring present to us. Good parenting really comes from learning as you go.
Ask yourself, “What kind of adults do I want my children to be?” and then set about to create the circumstances that will allow that to happen. You want your children to be “happy” but if you focus on making your children happy you will not be providing them with the skills they need to create their own happiness.
What you need to be doing is raising your children to be responsible, reliable, and productive adults.
Here are some parenting tips on how to raise responsible, reliable, and productive citizens for tomorrow’s society.
Let your children make mistakes – your child can never learn how to make a good decision if he is not allowed to make a bad one. As the parent you have more wisdom and knowledge about risk and it is your responsibility to assess the possible risk and consequences of a bad decision. Give your child the responsibility for making decisions that have consequences which are of low risk and age appropriate. Parents need to give over the responsibility of decision making and control to the child. This needs to be timed properly not only for the child’s age level but also by the child’s individual maturity level and trustworthiness.
Do not rescue your children from the consequences of their own mistakes. If your child harms someone else with her actions she needs to apologize and if she breaks someone else’s property then she needs to replace it. This can start with children when they are very young. If your child is never connected to the consequences of her own actions she can never develop a sense of responsibility and accountability for what she does. Your child has to make reparations for harm they caused someone else and it is highly recommended that you are involved in that reparation but only in a way that assists her. Your child should be involved from start to finish in carrying out the necessary apology or actions needed to make things right again.
Let your child see you make mistakes but more importantly let your child hear you talk about them and identify why that decision was wrong and what you learned from it. Then do not make the same mistake again! If you do not change your behaviour as a result of what you have learned your child will identify your insincerity and lack of integrity very quickly and know that your statements are meaningless. In short he will learn that you “talk the talk” but you do not “walk the walk”. Your child does not learn from your mistakes, your child learns by seeing you learn from your mistakes. Engaging your child in rationale analysis of why things went wrong will help them to develop skills of critical inquiry that will serve them well in adult life.
Take responsibility for your own mistakes. Most things that happen to you in life are the result of your own actions. If your child sees you taking responsibility she is less likely to see herself as a victim of circumstance and are more likely to feel empowered and in control of her own life.
Apologize when you are wrong. You cannot and should not expect yourself to be perfect. If you were wrong in your judgement say so. “I am so sorry I yelled at you like that, it was very unkind and I apologize. However, you did not follow the rules and so the punishment still stands.”
Teach your child how to ask for help. Perhaps the greatest life skill you can teach your child is that nobody can do everything by themselves all the time. We spend so much time trying to raise independent citizens of tomorrow we forget to teach our children how to ask for help. In order to be productive and positive citizens your child needs to know when he is out of his league and how to seek out help from those who are best equipped to help him. So many problems could be solved so easily if people would just recognize that they have a problem and seek out ways to prevent it from developing into something more complicated.
The best common sense parenting advice for raising your children to be reliable responsible adults? Be a good role model.
Like it or not your children will quite likely grow up to be just like you but in a slightly different package.
Learn How to Be a Great Parent If You Are a Woman
Bryan Burbank asked:
All of us want to be a good parents. Everyday women do their best to achieve what they perceive to be the perfect mother. But being a great mother is not something that can be achieved by waving a magic wand over your head and suddenly you are a great mother. It takes years of learning and practice. There will be many mistakes along the way, but don’t let that discourage you. In this article I would like to give you some tips that can hopefully make the job a little easier and not seem to be so daunting.
Get Free: Womens Parenting Advice
First, all children make mistakes and that is okay. Don’t feel a need to rescue them every time something seems to go wrong. You must allow them to make their own decisions. Of course these decisions must be age and maturity appropriate. As a parent you must give the responsibility of decision making and control over their lives to your children.
How to: Get Tips for Women
Second, one of the biggest mistakes a mother can make is when she has the need to rescue her child whenever the make a mistake. Children learn from their mistakes. The only way they learn responsibility is by owning their mistakes and learning how to rectify them. Teaching your child to say I’m sorry could be one of the most important things you ever teach them.
Third, making mistakes is also okay for you to make. As a parent we all make mistakes and letting your child see how you handle these mistakes is very important. How you handle mistakes will be a lesson for what your children will do in the future. Remember no one is perfect and don’t let your children think you are. If they think you never make mistakes they will never be honest with you about any mistakes they have made. This can cause them to run from responsibility.
Fourth, take responsibility for your actions, show them you are not a victim and most important show your child it is okay to ask for help. What your child learns usually comes not from what you teach them but how you live your own life.
All of us want to be a good parents. Everyday women do their best to achieve what they perceive to be the perfect mother. But being a great mother is not something that can be achieved by waving a magic wand over your head and suddenly you are a great mother. It takes years of learning and practice. There will be many mistakes along the way, but don’t let that discourage you. In this article I would like to give you some tips that can hopefully make the job a little easier and not seem to be so daunting.
Get Free: Womens Parenting Advice
First, all children make mistakes and that is okay. Don’t feel a need to rescue them every time something seems to go wrong. You must allow them to make their own decisions. Of course these decisions must be age and maturity appropriate. As a parent you must give the responsibility of decision making and control over their lives to your children.
How to: Get Tips for Women
Second, one of the biggest mistakes a mother can make is when she has the need to rescue her child whenever the make a mistake. Children learn from their mistakes. The only way they learn responsibility is by owning their mistakes and learning how to rectify them. Teaching your child to say I’m sorry could be one of the most important things you ever teach them.
Third, making mistakes is also okay for you to make. As a parent we all make mistakes and letting your child see how you handle these mistakes is very important. How you handle mistakes will be a lesson for what your children will do in the future. Remember no one is perfect and don’t let your children think you are. If they think you never make mistakes they will never be honest with you about any mistakes they have made. This can cause them to run from responsibility.
Fourth, take responsibility for your actions, show them you are not a victim and most important show your child it is okay to ask for help. What your child learns usually comes not from what you teach them but how you live your own life.
