Beverly OMalley asked:


We all want parenting advice that provides us with the tools we need to raise happy healthy children.

Good parenting does not result from using a standardized recipe or cookie cutter approach to the many challenges our offspring present to us. Good parenting really comes from learning as you go.

Ask yourself, “What kind of adults do I want my children to be?” and then set about to create the circumstances that will allow that to happen. You want your children to be “happy” but if you focus on making your children happy you will not be providing them with the skills they need to create their own happiness.

What you need to be doing is raising your children to be responsible, reliable, and productive adults.

Here are some parenting tips on how to raise responsible, reliable, and productive citizens for tomorrow’s society.

Let your children make mistakes – your child can never learn how to make a good decision if he is not allowed to make a bad one. As the parent you have more wisdom and knowledge about risk and it is your responsibility to assess the possible risk and consequences of a bad decision. Give your child the responsibility for making decisions that have consequences which are of low risk and age appropriate. Parents need to give over the responsibility of decision making and control to the child. This needs to be timed properly not only for the child’s age level but also by the child’s individual maturity level and trustworthiness.

Do not rescue your children from the consequences of their own mistakes. If your child harms someone else with her actions she needs to apologize and if she breaks someone else’s property then she needs to replace it. This can start with children when they are very young. If your child is never connected to the consequences of her own actions she can never develop a sense of responsibility and accountability for what she does. Your child has to make reparations for harm they caused someone else and it is highly recommended that you are involved in that reparation but only in a way that assists her. Your child should be involved from start to finish in carrying out the necessary apology or actions needed to make things right again.

Let your child see you make mistakes but more importantly let your child hear you talk about them and identify why that decision was wrong and what you learned from it. Then do not make the same mistake again! If you do not change your behaviour as a result of what you have learned your child will identify your insincerity and lack of integrity very quickly and know that your statements are meaningless. In short he will learn that you “talk the talk” but you do not “walk the walk”. Your child does not learn from your mistakes, your child learns by seeing you learn from your mistakes. Engaging your child in rationale analysis of why things went wrong will help them to develop skills of critical inquiry that will serve them well in adult life.

Take responsibility for your own mistakes. Most things that happen to you in life are the result of your own actions. If your child sees you taking responsibility she is less likely to see herself as a victim of circumstance and are more likely to feel empowered and in control of her own life.

Apologize when you are wrong. You cannot and should not expect yourself to be perfect. If you were wrong in your judgement say so. “I am so sorry I yelled at you like that, it was very unkind and I apologize. However, you did not follow the rules and so the punishment still stands.”

Teach your child how to ask for help. Perhaps the greatest life skill you can teach your child is that nobody can do everything by themselves all the time. We spend so much time trying to raise independent citizens of tomorrow we forget to teach our children how to ask for help. In order to be productive and positive citizens your child needs to know when he is out of his league and how to seek out help from those who are best equipped to help him. So many problems could be solved so easily if people would just recognize that they have a problem and seek out ways to prevent it from developing into something more complicated.



The best common sense parenting advice for raising your children to be reliable responsible adults? Be a good role model.

Like it or not your children will quite likely grow up to be just like you but in a slightly different package.

andrew.regan.2006@googlemail.com asked:

Every year of a child’s young life can be a challenge to work through for the parents as well as the child, and learning how to deal with specific situations as they arise can be tricky. After all, no one gives you a manual on how to be a good parent when your little bundle of joy arrives.

The terrible twos can be a particularly challenging time, for example, and having reliable sources of information to consult for advice and suggestions on how to deal with specific parenting issues can be a real help. This is particularly the case when you don’t know of any other parents who have children of a similar age to yours.

Thankfully this kind of information is easier to access now than it has ever been before – and it’s all due to the power of the internet, and its presence in the majority of homes.

Forums are an excellent way to find the advice you need, and get chatting with other parents who are probably going through exactly the same situation as you are. All around the world people are busy bringing up their children in the best way they know how, and there’s bound to be someone who can tell you what’s working for them.

Online forums are also a great way to make new friends, especially if you are parenting preschool children and you don’t have many opportunities to go out and meet up with parents that have kids of a similar age. The internet truly does bring the whole world closer – you could soon be chatting with someone on the other side of the world who has an excellent solution for helping their kids learn their ABC’s, for example.

Most forums are organised into sections, so you may even find the questions you want to ask have already been answered, and you can find the relevant information in the appropriate section. It’s a good idea to start by posting message in the sections that most appeal to you; for example if you are a single parent, start by browsing this section as there will be plenty of others there who are also bringing their children up single handed.

You might also be able to get in touch with other parents who live locally. Who knows, your online friends might be willing to start up a local group as well as having ‘virtual get togethers’ online.

The power of the internet to provide you with just the information you need to solve your parenting problems is very impressive. So the next time you are struggling to get your child to eat their dinner, why not log on and see who else is having the same problem? Perhaps you’ll be able to solve it together.

Joy Davenport asked:

Successful parenting what is the secret? That is something every parent wants to know. It is common for parents from all walks of life to need help in becoming better at what they do. Parenting is not easy with no doubts. There is no handbook, but fortunately, there is parenting help in Iowa. You can find out the secret to successful parenting as you read more below.

As a parent, you will teach your child many things. One of the most valuable things you can teach your child is self-discipline. When children acquire self discipline, they will act appropriately when you are absent and will not get into trouble.

Nothing is worse than children who act up in public or who are unruly when their parents are not around. You have probably had to deal with someone else’s child who refuses to behave. This is an example of how children act when they do not have self-discipline.

Many great virtues can be given to a child by teaching them self discipline. Children will learn to show respect, avoid trouble and stay away from bad possibilities. Your child will behave well during school hours, learn to think critically, and solve problems in a logical manner. Self-discipline is a skill that will benefit your child throughout their life.

You might not know what to do to help your child develop self-discipline. Parenting help in Iowa can help you. It never hurts to seek out parenting advice. You want to be the best parent and that you are willing to work at it.

Encouraging your youngster in all aspects of life will help them learn self control. Encourgement is always the way to go not allowing one to give in or leave. For finishing what they start you should encourage them to use their problem solving skills.

You should also foster a feeling of responsibility in your child. Give them chores and make them responsible for their own chores. If they have a pet, then they must provide care for it. Avoid trying to do everything for your child. Show them how they have to take responsibility for their choices.

We develop self-discipline through decision making processes. It helps them to learn to make good choices if a child knows that they will have to deal with the consequences of their actions. Do not shelter your child from bad things. Their own experiences will teach them good and bad. If you make decisions for them, they will not learn what they need to know to make their own decisions.

To help your child you will not be there always. In order to become a quality member of society, you need to impart the following to your child. Children who get into trouble, get bad grades in school and who seem to make bad choices lack self-discipline. You want the best for your child and through parenting help in Iowa, you can ensure that.

This parenting help has given you some great advice on the secret to successful parenting. Your goal as a parent should be to guide your child to being a productive and successful adult. It can be easier when you seek out parenting help in the long process and to learn the things you can do to raise great kids in the best way.